Well, we didn’t have this one on our Election 2024 BINGO card…
There are rumors going around that Donald Trump has actively been cheating on Melania Trump. This is wild, and we’re trying to approach this with a vaccine and three boosters’ worth of skepticism, but… Remember, he’s a reality TV star, and it’s cheating rumors. Frankly it would be irresponsible if PerezHilton.com didn’t look into it!
Related: Donald Trump Jr Just Implied His Dad Had Jeffrey Epstein Killed!
So here we go…
Who TF Is Laura Loomer?
OK, so this started going around last week after folks noticed Laura Loomer was by the president’s side at a September 11 memorial event. It set off alarm bells for a lot of folks because the self-styled right-wing pundit is, among many other things, a 9/11 truther. She’s publicly said the tragic destruction of the Twin Towers was “an inside job” acted out by the US government. Kind of wild to have someone who says stuff like that at an official memorial, next to family members of people who lost their lives that day. Total red flag!
Turns out she says awful things like that all the time. Most recently she got backlash for getting super racist and tweeting that if Kamala Harris — who is of Indian and Jamaican descent — wins in November, “the White House will smell like curry & White House speeches will be facilitated via a call center and the American people will only be able to convey their feedback through a customer satisfaction survey at the end of the call that nobody will understand.”
Yeesh! Even Trump couldn’t get away with saying some racist crap like that on 5th Avenue, right?
So reporters started looking into what role Loomer plays in Trump’s campaign. Apparently the answer is… none! A staffer told DailyMail.com:
“She’s not a campaign staffer. She’s not part of the campaign. She was on this trip, but by no means is she part of the campaign in the official capacity.”
A source told the outlet Trump has been trying to get Loomer on the campaign payroll for months, but his campaign co-managers Susie Wiles put her foot down. But she couldn’t stop him from keeping her around, apparently…
Incriminating Photos
Loomer has been flying around with Trump on his campaign plane. She was by his side at events. There are multiple recent photos where his arm is around her and vice versa.
Trump has got a new girlfriend it seems. Explains why Laura Loomer and MTG have been going at it so much lately. pic.twitter.com/8OGhJdVksL
— clovis (@clovis_raeburn_) September 13, 2024
It’s been confirmed that Laura Loomer has been spending nights at Mar-A-Largo with Donald Trump. At the same time @MELANIATRUMP has been stuck in NYC, refusing to go back to Florida which she called “a swamp.”
He isn’t even hiding it anymore, wrapping his arm around Laura and… pic.twitter.com/Rpv3GJVwCY
— Pesach Lattin ???????????? (@pesach_lattin) September 12, 2024
????????????
My favorite President! pic.twitter.com/kf8NikKr2J
— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) August 27, 2024
We mean, if this happened with George Clooney and some younger woman while Amal was at home… what would people say? You can be damn sure if Kamala was bringing around some 31-year-old guy with no official position in the campaign while Doug Emhoff was left at home in California, the media would NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT IT. We mean, really, when’s the last time you saw Melania with Donald?
OK, so WTF??
Reporters finally asked Trump last week what the heck was going on, why this random woman was flying around and attending events with him if she wasn’t an adviser. His answer, given at his Southern California golf club on Thursday, was less than inspiring. He defended Loomer, saying:
“Laura is a supporter… she has very strong opinions… she’s a free spirit. I can’t tell Laura what to do.”
OK, so one option is that Trump is hiding the fact she’s an adviser on the campaign. Even he can recognize her statements are too out there to be connected to him on paper, so she technically doesn’t have a role? Or they’re lying about it?
Another option is Trump just likes her a whole lot. It’s a totally platonic friendship between a rich and famous 78-year-old man and an ambitious 31-year-old woman…
And the third option — the only other one we can think of — is they’re having an affair. That seems to be the conclusion of a lot of folks out there, and who can blame them? We mean, it is the man’s M.O.
Trump’s Cheating History
He cheated on Ivana with Marla Maples. He even flouted it, infamously inviting her along on a family ski trip. The story goes he tried to hide her until she just walked right up to Ivana and broke the news. (This is all documented btw.)
He once claimed he had “three other girlfriends” at the same time as Marla. And when he was married to her was when he sexually assaulted E. Jean Carroll in that Bergdorf’s changing room. Remember, Trump has been found legally liable for sexual abuse in that case. This is a matter of record. There is legal proof he was not faithful to Marla.
And then there’s Melania. We mean, once again we’ve got the law. Trump was literally found guilty of fraud for covering up hush money payments to porn star Stormy Daniels. What was he silencing her for saying? That they had unprotected sex in a hotel room while Melania was at home with baby Barron. And of course Playboy model Karen McDougal has also claimed she had a months-long affair with Trump around the same time — and she was also paid hush money.
So yeah. He cheated on ALL his wives. And Melania already, so… It’s just too damn easy to believe the affair explanation. Why wouldn’t someone think that’s what was going on? And it’s largely conservatives spreading the rumor — ones who think this is BAD for Trump and want him to stop (or at least keep it secret better).
A Bad Source
OK, so one person is actually claiming to have insider knowledge that Trump and Loomer ARE a thing. Not just reading into it, not just hints. This is someone who runs in the same circles as Laura Loomer saying this is a real thing.
Unfortunately that person is Milo Yiannopoulos…
The right-wing provocateur has been tweeting about it, including making this bold claim:
“Laura Loomer is telling our mutual friends that her “intimate relationship” with the President led to “the best blowjob of his life.” His words, according to Laura.”
Laura Loomer is telling our mutual friends that her “intimate relationship” with the President led to “the best blowjob of his life.” His words, according to Laura.
— MILO (@Nero) September 14, 2024
Now, again, this is Milo we’re talking about. You take everything with a grain of salt. But it is worth noting… sometimes the right-wingers really do have the dirt on each other. The real stuff. And when they turn on one another it gets ROUGH. Remember when Congressman Madison Cawthorn got offended by learning a bunch of Republican lawmakers were having drug-fueled orgies? And he came out and said it, then his own scandalous stuff was leaked, and boom, career over? Just sayin’.
Milo actually is someone who might know. Remember, both pundits have been close with Kanye West, they really are part of the same movement. Unfortunately, we’re thinking anyone close to Trump and Loomer at this point would be a terrible source. So we likely wouldn’t get any credible confirmation even if this was true they were having an affair.
Her Denial
Over the weekend, Loomer actually did take time to address the rumor. The rumor got all the way to Bill Maher. On his Real Time show Friday, he was responding to Loomer’s comments about Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift being in an “arranged relationship.” Just the way she was spreading unfounded rumors, he mocked her right back with the one about her, saying:
“I think maybe Laura Loomer’s in an arranged relationship to influence the election because she’s very close to Trump. She’s 31. Looks like his type… We did an editorial here a few years ago… ‘Who’s Trump f**king?’ Because I said, ‘it’s not nobody. He’s been a dog for too long. And it’s not Melania.’ I think we may have our answer this week.”
Loomer responded right away, tweeting:
“This is beyond the pale and it’s a complete and blatant lie. I have never in my life seen such a coordinated attack by the mainstream Media, the White House and leftist personalities to target a private citizen and investigative journalist simply because I flew on a plane and I support Donald Trump. This is unacceptable. And it’s a full blown LIE and incredibly disrespectful to President Trump and first lady Melania Trump.”
Despite the fact the mainstream media has NOT been covering this, she used it as another opportunity to pretend she’s being persecuted on her podcast on Saturday:
“They’ve taken it so far, and you know if I was a leftist journalist, if I was a Democrat, oh my God, the media would be up in arms if the Republican media was doing this to a left-wing journalist. ‘Oh my god, they’re misogynist, they’re bullying a woman, they’re trying to Monica Lewinsky her, they’re trying to discredit the fact that she’s a working woman.’”
OK, first off… Laura Loomer is not a journalist. Just want to make that clear. A troll who gets clicks by spreading misinformation and racist insults is not a “journalist.”
Second, we’re not seeing the misogyny in looking at the way Trump is behaving and seeing the pattern we’ve seen in his past marriages starting to emerge, especially as Melania hides away in NYC or Mar-a-Lago, wherever she is.
Finally, on BOTH points, we’ll say it again. If the situation was in the other campaign, if Kamala Harris was seen with her arm around some young hunk left wing pundit, who was flying around with her and attending official events despite having no role in the campaign? The media would absolutely be covering it. They’d be all over it. Laura Loomer herself would be making racist, misogynistic jokes about them having sex. Hell, all the right-wing pundits have been happy enough to say Kamala slept her way to the top for the past few weeks. Who is Loomer kidding? They always want to pretend they’re so respectful when they’re playing the victim.
Hands Off
In any case, if there was an affair going on, Trump’s wranglers put a stop to it. We heard that over the weekend Loomer was BANNED from Trump’s plane, the Lolita Express II. (Sorry, but we do have to mention at least once that his jet is Jeffrey Epstein’s old one. It’s just too insane.) It’s unclear who took control, but it seems to be how everyone working with Trump feels. One staffer told NBC News:
“She has to go. Laura Loomer cannot stay. She just can’t. She is unapologetic. This woman attacked the vice president of the United States in such a racist manner. It was appalling and she hasn’t apologized.”
Yeah, affair or not, just the fact he’s choosing to keep this person around is speaking volumes about his opinions of her comments. And his team know it! Another ally told him:
“If you don’t fix this, it will be a problem.”
Again, it’s not some left-wing conspiracy who’s pumping her numbers on X, it isn’t the mainstream media. She says awful things, and Republicans who like Trump are concerned. Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene and Senators Lindsey Graham and Thom Tillis have spoken out against her, trying to dissuade Trump from spending more time with her. She called MTG “jealous and vindictive” and outed Lindsey Graham as gay, telling him to come out of the closet. Sigh.
But now she’s gone, from Trump’s plane anyway. So it looks like Laura lost this one. But who knows? Trump really hates being told what to do, so maybe he’ll invite her back as an October surprise.
What do YOU think of this pair, Perezcious registered voters? Do you buy that something is going on? OR is the romance all rumor — and just the racism is real?? Hey, look at it this way… You’ll always have 9/11.
[Image via Laura Loomer/Twitter.]
